{what a difference 4 days makes}

Trying to decide what all I want to say here & how I want to say it. The end result is the same no matter what, and that is that J & I officially ended what we never really officially started. And we're good. I'm good. It's all good. Not going to say that it didn't sting a little, but we know what's best for us, and this it.

There's something about our friendship that can't be explained. Something about the conversations that took place through out the day on Friday that are unique to us. Something very reassuring when he says that we'll always be friends. Something true about it.

And quite honestly, I'm breathing a little easier today. After many phone calls back & forth Friday, I told myself I was going to give it the weekend before talking again. My main concern was things being weird between us. Even though we had backed it up to the friends status weeks ago, "it" was still there. Friday's talks made the friends status very clear, no ifs, ands or buts about it. While I was feeling OK with all this, I figured we'd still need a couple days to decompose. Apprently he thought differently. Come Saturday morning, we were back to the old us, the conversation was flowing like it used to, before emotions got involved & things got complicated. Thats when I relized, I like this verison of us better. At this point in time at least, we are so much better off as friends. I'd even venture to say he's joined the ranks of 'best friend' in my world. I've missed being able to call him & talk about the things we used to talk about & I'm so glad to have him back in that sense. There's some things that I haven't told him yet about the past few weeks, some stories that he's only heard half of, but I'm sure it will all come at some point. I don't doubt that I've not been told 100% of his life the past few weeks either, but again, it will all come out. I'm just not ready to share it all with him yet....nor am I ready to hear all of what he has to say.

But really, we're good. And I'm very happy with the current situation.