Reconnect

Taking a break from MAJOR house cleaning (that will be a later post!)....

Em's birthday party is next weekend. So is my sister's wedding. (half sister, same dad, different moms) Which means that all of my dad's family will be in town for the weekend and therefore coming to Em's party.....at my house...my 2 bedroom duplex...lots of people. Flashback to Em's first birthday party. Her dad's cousin got married that same weekend, therefore all of his family was in town & came to the party too. Her first birthday party had 80+ people at it, I don't know that there were even that many people at my wedding. There were people at that party that I had never met before. Now, fast forward to this party, her 5th birthday. My dad just called & wanted to make sure it was OK that my cousin Becky is going to bring her 2 kids. I told him of course, that's fine. The more the merrier right? I can handle this.

Here's the other thing though, he called to make sure it was OK. I love my dad. I really do, but it's been a hard road to get to where we are. To get to the point that I don't cringe when I see his name on my caller ID. To get to the point that I can call him when I have a problem or when I just want to say hi. But it wasn't always like that. My mom & dad divorced when before I was 2 and shortly after that he went to jail....for a long time. Nothing serious, it was drug related. While in jail he did what lots of people do, he found God. Which is great...but when he got out he tried to pretend I was the same little girl that I was when he went it. I was almost a teenager by then & he wanted me to sit on his lap & let him bite my ears. And he wanted to tell me all about God. At that time, those aren't things I wanted to do or hear. For a long time I stayed away from him. My mom would make me call him, make me spend time with him, she was great about making sure that my dad & I formed a relationship, but it was never the normal father daughter relationship. I don't know when it changed. It got a little better when I got married and a little more when I had a child. But it's really been in the past couple years that things have gotten to this point of comfort with him. I can see him for who he is now and I can appreciate who he is. I can appreciate the relationship between him and my mom, who are friends & talk on the phone on a regular basis. I can appreciate that side of my family and the Hispanic culture that has been missing from my life for so long. And I can't wait to see my cousin Becky, the one cousin I ever bonded with on that side of my family. I can't wait to meet her kids (we were both pregnant at my wedding & haven't seen each other since then) and for her to meet Em.

I'm really looking forward to next weekend. To Em's party, to my sisters wedding, to reconnecting.